It’s Okay To Not Be Okay

I’m working on finding a balance between being open and honest with you guys yet also allowing myself to keep my personal life somewhat personal. This topic very much so straddles that line but I think it’s okay. At least this one time!

I consider myself to be a very positive person. I have a deep belief in positive thinking bring positive outcomes. Now I know this can be annoying to some people and I definitely have been accused of being fake happy more times than I can count, but I will always believe in focusing on the positive in life and manifesting your desires. That being said, I’m not always okay or happy or feeling very positive and that’s okay.

I get all of this and I am more than okay with it, it’s letting myself share this with others that has become the difficult part. I guess since I have become this positive, happy person, I have also become afraid to let people see me when I’m sad. Rather than talking to people about why I’m not feeling great, I’d rather just hide in my room, away from the world. I have never understood how some people find it so easy to open up to others. I’m not sure what caused it but I rarely turn to others when I’m feeling low or need guidance in life yet I am often times the one everyone else comes to. I find it so important to discuss your problems and concerns in order to properly understand them and how they’re affecting you, so why do I find it so hard? Someone once explained it to me by saying “you are everyones best friend, but no one is yours.” This sounds so incredibly harsh but it made so much sense.

I guess the first step in improving yourself is to fully understand what the problem is. So little by little I am going to work on opening up to others, and you all, and allowing people to help me when I really need it.

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39 Comments

  1. Charlie Tsao
    March 12, 2017 / 11:35 am

    Be strong and Be happy
    Nothing compares to you

  2. Joeyinn
    March 12, 2017 / 6:22 pm

    Although I’m still not quite sure what the direction of this blog is going to be, you can always write up how you feel when you’re not okay and post it here I guess.
    I sometimes have stronger connection with written words than anything else, I can’t really explain it, it just feels more intimate. Your writing shows your personality and who you are, I only wish the posts are longer and in more detail. Please do share more with us when you’re ready, Cammie. I really look forward to it.

    • cammiescott
      March 17, 2017 / 2:15 pm

      I completely agree with connecting to written words most. Will definitely do longer ones as well.

  3. Catiana
    March 13, 2017 / 12:21 pm

    Thank you for sharing so many things with us Cammie!!you are amazing and you always hit the point!thank you and keep being who you are and more importantly keep doing you!! Can’t wait for more posts on here!

  4. Jace Ramos
    March 14, 2017 / 3:49 pm

    I am currently dealing with the same issue. Exactly. It’s crazy how I am there for everyone I know and help them through their problems so much but I can’t even help myself. I bottle up my thoughts and feelings, sadly for doing this for years I am currently dealing with the start of depression. I want to work my way out of it because it’s not a fun life. When the time feels right, tell us how you have overcome this situation you’re in and how you are feeling about yourself now.

  5. Melanie
    March 17, 2017 / 1:52 pm

    I feel the same way. It is so much easier for me to listen to other peoples problems and comment on them than it is for me to open up to them. I have noticed that when I do open up to anyone it is always through writing it in a text or on twitter in a message. I find it easier doing it that way than actually talking to them face to face.

  6. Crystal
    March 17, 2017 / 1:54 pm

    Hey Cammie! How’ve you been feeling? ? This post was my favorite because we got to see you in a different way!! I’m sure it took a lot of courage…..it was just so raw and real and genuine!! Thank you for allowing us to see you in such a vulnerable state…..it was appreciated and very helpful as well!

    • cammiescott
      March 17, 2017 / 2:16 pm

      it’s so great hearing such supportive words when I share things this personal <3 thank you so much!

  7. Rachel Nguyen
    March 22, 2017 / 2:14 am

    I had the same problem with you…sometimes, it’s just like..yeah, fake happiness. But of course I feel okay to be positive and happy ( all the time) to people, but it was just to hide my sorrow. Then I decided to live as honest and real as you can. believe me people open thier hearts too, especially with someone so kind and down to earth like you. Love you!

    • rosie
      April 19, 2017 / 6:42 am

      favorite post <3

  8. C
    March 23, 2017 / 7:25 pm

    Hey cammie! I’m wasn’t sure where to comment this but I hope I found the right place. I’m a huge fan of yours and your videos have helped me through a lot. I have a little story about not being ok that maybe I could get some advice on? So sorry if this is way too much or something! So, I came out this fall as bisexual to my best friend. It was the first time I had told anyone, and I haven’t even told my family. We would always tell each other everything and she’s really smart and kind and always seemed to have amazing responses. A few months later however, things started to change. She began to be mean to me and some other friends of mine. Now it’s march and I would call it bullying. But the story gets worse, now that I don’t have her in my life like before, i realized how much she means to me. I realized she’s the first crush I have ever had on a girl, and of course she has to be my best friend that bully’s me…?? It’s a crazy world. Anyway, this video really helped me to realize that I am not ok and that in itself is alright. I have talked to some people now and am trying to get this figured out. I just wanted to say thank you. You are helping many others by sharing your story, and I know it must be hard. I hope that cheered you up a bit maybe, but if you have any tips I would be more than thankful. I know it’s a lot and it’s super crazy so just letting this out helped. Thanks!

  9. Natasha
    March 27, 2017 / 7:12 pm

    It is ok not to be ok, and I think it’s those moments that make us as people stronger then what we are. I too don’t like talking about how I feel when i’m not ok but rather then let it make me sad, I use it to make myself stronger and accept things for the way they are. Because being not ok is fine, life doesnt have to be perfect and I think the more imperfect life we lead just means we’ve come along way to becoming the people we should be proud of being.

  10. Brenda C
    March 28, 2017 / 8:30 am

    When I saw this video of yours, I was like, ” I am not okay..” I was thinking that I don’t know where I am going in life. High school is going down to hell. My family and I aren’t that good. I don’t know what to do with my life, I just turned 17 on March 19th, and I got no plan. I wanna be a youtube creator, that’s for sure. But, I don’t have my dream recording set, I have to use my phone. Which I don’t mind, but still. Cammie, reading your blogs make see things that I’ve never seen. Last thing I want to say is THANK YOU>

  11. Aubrey
    April 5, 2017 / 4:14 pm

    Thank you for being so open and honest on a vulnerable subject. EMOTIONS. UGH. But really, to my surprise you pretty much read my mind. I wasn’t quite sure what to expect from this video and post, but through it all, all I could do was nod and think that there is actually someone else out there who relates to something that is both recognized yet elusive within myself, and apparently within others too. “You are everyone’s best friend, but no one is yours” is how I described it to myself so it was weird but also comforting to hear that phrase come from someone else. Always had a hard time relying on and presenting a vulnerable self to others. Internalizing emotions is just second nature. Definitely impacts relationships even when we don’t mean for it to. It’s tough. Here’s to the days when we have our revelations and figure ourselves out!

  12. Gaebriel Joy
    April 16, 2017 / 9:41 am

    I can totally relate, Cammie! Im one of those people that everyone goes to for advice or help or just for someone to listen to them, but I alsl like keeping my feelings and pretty much everything else private, so when I feel like it’s getting all too much, I cant just go running to someone because I feel like they wouldnt understand and also think ”where did this suddenly come from? You seemed totally fine this past few days”. So im working on being open more and on accepting help from others.

  13. Gaebriel Joy
    April 16, 2017 / 9:44 am

    Btw, when you posted this on youtube I got worried because of the title and the thumbnail. Aw, cammie!! Remember that we always have your back. Love you!!

  14. Ophelie Dodson
    April 16, 2017 / 9:56 am

    Hey Cammie, this will always be my favorite blog post, because I can actually relate to this. I watched the video when it came out and it actually made me cry, but that’s not the point right now. Trough out the years I tried to find some kind of help via internet, and your channel was the solution. I’ve always looked happy on the outside and tried to help others while putting myself on the last place. But I know now that it’s okay to love yourself a liitle more than other. And yes it’s okay to not be okay.

    Keep doing what you’re doing, I’ll support and love you all the way.

  15. Kailey
    April 16, 2017 / 10:04 am

    I really like this blog because it really shows me that I am not alone in feeling not okay. I went through a rough time these past few years and knowing that I wasn’t alone made me feel a whole lot better and knowing that everything takes time. #infullbloomgiveaway

  16. Seryn
    April 16, 2017 / 10:09 am

    This has been my fav post so far. Loving your blog. Thank you for always being so helpful, honest and relatable Cammie. ?

  17. alice olsen
    April 16, 2017 / 10:21 am

    this helped me talk to people around me, realise that I dont have to put up a front, so thank you

  18. Callie Marlar
    April 16, 2017 / 10:36 am

    I love this post, Cammie! It’s so important to be open about this kind of thing so that other people can see they’re not alone. I’m working on being this open, too. Much love. Xx.

  19. Eleanor
    April 16, 2017 / 10:48 am

    Love how much this explained my thoughts and how not being okay is okay ❀

  20. Saman Jamal
    April 16, 2017 / 1:37 pm

    Hey camden… its really ok.. to not to be ok.. sometimes you just let yourself feel the pain.. or whatever… we can not smile and be happy everytime in front of ither people.. just hate it…
    Love your blog.. keep smiling .. πŸ™‚
    And ofcourse congratulations fir your blog and your jewellery line.. .
    Your indian follower..

  21. kat
    April 16, 2017 / 5:14 pm

    this is my favorite post so far. i love love love how honest you are it is so inspiring. as a 15 year old girl it is so comforting to see someone who shows that life is not always easy it makes me and so many feel like they are not alone. this (as well as all your blog posts) is so well written and really describes how i feel.

    side note: you have helped me so so soon much. as i am trying to figure myself out you truly show what it is like to be a strong woman who kicks ass and is part of the lgbtq+ community. i love you too much and i am so excited for the future of the blog.

  22. Anabel
    April 16, 2017 / 6:08 pm

    This is my fav blog post so far!! I related to it so much and it makes me feel good to see that I am not alone ☺️?

  23. Jess Deveau
    April 16, 2017 / 8:36 pm

    Getting to hear advice that is honest and raw from someone who I have looked up to for years is really helpful and it makes it easier to hear the message because it comes from you. This is my favorite of your blogs so far because of how raw it is even though I know you’re currently struggling with the line between keeping us involved and having your own life. I respect how you’re doing so, we love being involved but to me you being happy is more important than that. I just appreciate you letting us in at all. Seeing the world through your eyes is such a great opportunity, gotta love being able to have social media. It’s you’re being open to us is what made me happy and proud of who I am and made me feel like my sexuality doesn’t need to define who I am but I don’t have to be at all ashamed. Thank you for putting so much time and effort into everything, we all appreciate it so much.

    • Jess Deveau
      April 23, 2017 / 8:03 pm

      What’s the best way to contact you?? I am always hoping anxiously that you’ll see my posts but I know you have thousands lol

  24. Samantha
    April 16, 2017 / 10:11 pm

    This is my absolute most favorite/relatable post. Knowing that someone who I look up to can feel the same way I have been feeling really makes me feel not as alone. I love how open you can be and are so honest and truthful. Just reading this blog has made me realize that I don’t have to always put on a front and make people think I am okay and happy when I am truly sad on the inside.

  25. Brooke
    April 17, 2017 / 2:19 am

    This is my favourite post by far, knowing that other people feel this way and having someone to look up to is absolutely amazing. Getting to hear advice that is so honest and uncensored helps so many people in finding the balance in their lives.
    Thank you so much Cammie, you’re an amazing and beautiful person both inside and out. I’m so inspired by you and proud of everything you’re achieving in your life.

  26. Roksana
    April 17, 2017 / 5:10 am

    Sometimes people are hiding their emotions so do I, but oviously it’s not healthy for us. I think you’re right we have to try to do our best to be more open and we have to stop being afraid of showing our emotions.
    It’s definately my favourite post because I get it and I know how it is.
    Thank you for sharing it with us because it means a lot for many people.

  27. Eva
    April 17, 2017 / 8:00 am

    I respect you so much for opening up to the people that support you and try to explain how you feel, for me everything you say were the words i could never get out of my mouth… You explained it just the way i wanted to tell people a long time from now but i just couldn’t know how, i sent them the link of your video and that way i kinda explained how i feel and what i need, so i thank you for making that video, you helped me so much and my connection with my family is better ever since i saw your video ❀ though i am really sorry you have to feel like this sometimes… you deserve way better than these crappy and anxiety feelings in your life ? you are a real inspiration ❀?

  28. Tori-Gaye
    April 17, 2017 / 3:54 pm

    When you posted that video, I honestly related to it on a deep level and reading this post is a reminder of that. Somehow I feel like I have become this person who tries to be outwardly positive in social situations. I smile and laugh but sometimes when I’m alone, I feel as though I’m merely pretending to be. I know that’s probably not the exact thing that you explained but I just want you to know that I can understand how you feel on some level. Sometimes I feel as though I try to be that shoulder to cry on for everyone else but in my time of need, I feel completely isolated from everyone around me. I think I find it hard vocalizing how I feel sometimes because I feel as though people won’t understand and they’ll just think it’s stupid so I just try to keep it to myself, which isn’t healthy but I’m working on it. Working on acknowledging that what I feel, whether good or bad, matters. Thank you for sharing a part of yourself Cammie! I’m here for you and I’m sure everyone else here feels the same way. It’s okay to not be okay and let people know it. I love you ❀️

  29. Amanda Marie
    April 17, 2017 / 7:25 pm

    This has to be my favorite post from Cam. It’s so relatable it hurts and there is such raw honesty and grace in these words. I often feel like I can’t reach out for help if I am struggling with something because I am supposed to have it all together, or I am scared that no one else will understand. This post definitely helps reinforce the idea that no matter what you are going through you are not alone, and reaching out for help is not a sign of weakness – but of strength. Thanks Cammie!

  30. Louise
    April 18, 2017 / 5:21 am

    Hi, I’m french, so sorry if my english is wrong <3

    I feel actually the same this time, and it's hard because nobody really talks about it, we hide our emotions because we're scared, it's like sometimes it doesn't matter, the way you feel or what you think, you just have to stay quiet and live your life.
    your words are just perfect, the way you explain what some of us feel makes me realise that I'm not alone and that I can reach out for help.

    I don't really know what to say, but thank you for this video and this post, it really helped me.. <3

  31. April 18, 2017 / 11:45 pm

    Love this post and also love you because you make me feel normal and safe. Without your help through YouTube’s I still would not accept myself for who i am and who i like. Thank you. xoxo

  32. rosie
    April 19, 2017 / 6:42 am

    favorite post <3

  33. elizabeth (@dnversbeveridge)
    April 23, 2017 / 5:00 pm

    This is one of my favorite posts. I usually don’t comment but I just watched the giveaway video so, Hi πŸ™‚

  34. Strawberri22
    April 25, 2017 / 1:41 pm

    I so honestly agree with this post. It says everything that we people in society think,but do not say. We also try to always be ok ,but I so feel that it is ok not to be ok sometimes and I feel like this alot . Thanks so much for posting this !! πŸ™‚

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